Love, Blessings, and Messes

Love, Blessings, and Messes

Today is the day! My sister and I are taking the red eye into NYC from Seattle. We land at 6 AM and are going to take the Long Island Rail Road to Penn Station and then a cab to our hotel in Midtown. The problem is we can’t check in until 3 PM but the hotel did say we could leave our luggage there. I am already dying inside at the thought of having to drag it around Penn Station. It is packed with sassy and unforgiving New Yorkers. My sister is in for a rude awakening at the fast pace of New York…I certainly took a long time to get used to it. After we deposit our bags our adventure begins immediately! We are going to wander around the City until our room is ready and then take a probably much needed nap. Then we are going to see Wicked on Broadway at the Gershwin. I have always wanted to see Wicked but it was WAY out of my budget. Our mama surprised us with tickets though!

This brings me to the real purpose of this blog. Blessings. I have lived a life that has seen darkness and brightness. Haven’t we all? Today I want to focus on the bright spots and blessings. Many of my blessings have come from  my choices. My siblings and I had two choices growing up: the streets or school. My brothers chose the streets and now one is dead and the other is in rehab. My sister and I chose school and now we are headed to New York. I won’t lie, when I was in my early twenties I didn’t always make the best choices and I’ve had to pay for the mistakes I made. But 28-29 were my years. In the same year I graduated college with a business degree and certifications on the dean’s list, I bought my first house on my own and enrolled in real estate school and only have about 30 hours left to do. I rid myself of toxic relationships and friendships and learned to play the cards I have been dealt. Not only that but I came to terms with my religion and opened my mind to accepting more. And then there is him.

What started out as casual conversation rapidly turned into fireworks. Our chemistry is insane, out of control, passionate and fiery. We quickly became inseparable. We both have darkness in our past and we both strive to stay in the light now. Where I am weak he is strong and vice versa. & let me tell you, I am by no means an easy woman to love. I am hard headed, sassy, and independent. It takes a strong man to love women like me. The best part is I truly believe the universe delivered him to me. I manifested so hard for a strong and deserving love and when I wasn’t even looking he popped up. The moment I set my eyes on him I knew I had to have him and I had no idea how it was going to happen but it had to. I didn’t even have to do the work, the universe did it for me.

I am happy and blessed and so incredibly grateful for what the universe has delivered me throughout my life. Even the hard times were lessons learned. I wouldn’t be half the woman I am if I hadn’t weathered the storms I have.

Blessed be!

Well, I’ve run through rainbows
And castles of candy
I’ve cried a river of tears
From the pain

I try to dance with
What life has to hand me
My partner’s been pleasure
My partner’s been pain

There are days
When I swear I could
Fly like an eagle
And dark desperate hours
That nobody sees

My arms stretched triumphant
On top of the mountain
My head in my hands
Down on my knees

Sometimes it’s a bitch
Sometimes it’s a breeze
Sometimes love’s blind
And sometimes it sees
Sometimes it’s roses
And sometimes it’s weeds
Sometimes it’s a bitch
Sometimes it’s a breeze

I’ve reached in darkness
And come out with treasure
I’ve laid down with love
And I woke up with lies

What’s it all worth
Only the heart can measure
It’s not what’s in the mirror
But what’s left inside

Sometimes it’s a bitch
Sometimes it’s a breeze
Sometimes love’s blind
And sometimes it sees
Sometimes it’s roses
And sometimes it’s weeds
Sometimes it’s a bitch
Sometimes it’s a breeze

You gotta take it as it comes
Sometimes it don’t come easy

I’ve run through rainbows
And castles of candy
And I’ve cried a river of tears
From the pain

I tried to dance with
What life had to hand me
And if I could
I’d do it all over again
-Stevie Nicks

 

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