I am at a point where I am torn between staying on an elevated frequency of positive vibes and light and going the fuck off on people. Mercury in retrograde has REALLY been messing with my life the past week. But, I think it’s actually a blessing. Several people have shown me their true colors and it isn’t something I am willing to tolerate. I am willing to bet they still read the blog, so let me break this down for you.
I am not “passive aggressive”. I have absolutely no issue with talking woman to woman or friend to friend with anyone. Part of my delightful charm is my lack of filter. You never have to wonder “wtf is she thinking?” because more likely than not I am going to speak on it. But when you’re an unstable individual who only wants to have life talks when you’re shit faced, I can’t speak candidly because I would rather talk to a brick wall than a drunk,abusive person. You cannot go crazy on me and then think I will want to hangout or keep talking to you. That isn’t how life or healthy relationships work.
Tonight I am going to sage the fuck out of myself and my house, and banish all negativity from my life. I have a GORGEOUS boyfriend, a handful of amazing friends who are worth my time and energy, a family that supports me, an education, a career, health, and sanity. THOSE are the things I am going to focus on. Not the mental instability that has been thrust upon me.
Mercury, you can go fuck yourself. I am at my wit’s end and beyond ready for my vacation. I am going to miss my boyfriend and my cats but my heart needs New York right now.
This is 100% a venting blog and is for my own therapeutic purposes so please forgive the raw humanness of it. Today I am just a girl experiencing angst and stress. Tomorrow I will go back to being the fierce witty witch, you can bet on that.