I will admit that suffering a break up at the beginning of February makes entering any store nauseating. Just the other day I was headed towards the toilet paper aisle to find myself parting a sea of heart balloon ribbons and weaving my way in and out of teddy bears and heart shaped boxes filled with chocolates. My immediate bodily response was a constricted chest, tears sprang into my eyes and I ran as fast as I could to the toilet paper. Then I realized I was running away from expressions of love to….toilet paper. And I felt worse. But then I looked back at past Valentines Days and how even when I am in a relationship, I don’t care for it all that much. Yes, as tradition, it was a day to indulge in a steak we couldn’t afford any other time of year but we were celebrating our love of food more than our love for each other….because our love was expressed every other day of the year.
So if you find yourself like me, single on Valentines Day, do not fret, do not run towards the nearest aisle to escape the parade of commercialized symbols of love. Make a game plan. Date the living shit out of yourself that day. Take yourself to dinner, buy yourself some damn flowers, eat a pint of ice cream…whatever it is that you want to do to show yourself that you are in love with you. More importantly, take in all the sappy, cute pictures on Facebook or Instagram and FEEL your friends joy. Don’t feel bitter and resentful. Simply soak up the love they are feeling and channel it into yourself. I would also recommend taking this day and this time to be extra attentive to your own needs. Ask yourself how you are doing. Write a list of things you love about yourself. Maybe even step out of your comfort zone and ask your friends what they love about you. If you look, you will find an endless supply of love in the universe, but it starts with you.
We have all suffered a broken heart on Valentines Day and it feels like a special kind of torture. But it doesn’t have to. In the grand scheme of things, it is just another box on the calendar with a number in the corner. Take care of you.